“Stop trying so hard la, you’ll never be good enough.”
That was one of the many nasty remarks I endured throughout my lower secondary school years. Contrary to popular belief, I was a kid who was constantly bashed by her schoolmates for the silliest things people hated me for.
See, I always stood out like a sore thumb because of the attention I received from boys for my appearance. I am also a very loud person, and that seemed to attract more unnecessary dislike. I was raised to believe I should always be myself no matter what others commented about me, but it nonetheless affected me. When you’re brought down again and again by people whom seem to enjoy gloating at your misery, it eventually breaks you.
I became insecure, I lost confidence in myself. For a while, I became a broken shell of myself. I wasn’t that cheerful, carefree girl anymore.
I panicked and got so nervous whenever it came to crowds. I was afraid of showing my face.
But it gradually got better. As I grew older, my mindset matured and changed.
I learnt to stand up for myself and view myself in a different light. I was tired of being the girl everyone mocked.
With my family’s support, I believed in myself more.
I learnt to accept myself.
I embraced the fact that I wasn’t born to please anybody.
I embraced the fact that I should never, ever, ever be ashamed of who I am.
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